Body Confidence

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Such a different topic today, but something that's quite close to home. These posts have been floating around different blogs for the past few days or so, and really they've brought back a lot of issues I had whilst being at school and trying to grow into my own self. By all means this isn't a sympathy post or a 'look at me' kind'a post, just want to get this out there, for myself and for others who could may well be going through a similar time.

For years I've felt fat, vile and absolutely useless, both emotionally and physically. Being at an all girls school didn't really help, you can imagine how bitchy it was especially when you get to that age where make up and having the right figure matters - does it? My Mum often put me on diets when I was younger because I was a chubby kid, so that still kind of haunts me today and sometimes wonder if that's where the lack of confidence has come from. That being said my brother a while back said something along the lines of "I remember when you had no confidence, wouldn't eat and was too self conscious to wear anything that showed you" as I sat there in a little top and a pencil skirt.

Even though today I do slightly accept myself, there's still areas I'd like to change. Possibly tone up my stomach more, so it's flat and has more definition to it, same with my legs and arms; as peachy as my bum is a girl can never want a more peachy bum right? So that's aaaalways on my mind to tone up a little or peach up, can I say that? Working out gave me a bit of a confidence boost, along with the support of my boyfriend who without a doubt calls me beautiful and perfect every single day (lapping up the attention I know), just these little things gave me a boost to accept who I am and what I look like; sure the lack of confidence and tears cause the odd argument but he understands and supports me all the same. But it's not always been so rosy, having a crappy 'serious' relationship all too quick before took it's toll, I stopped eating for months only ate one small meal, dropping a lot, a hell of a lot of weight too quickly, abusing diet pills and fat melters for fast results, all be it I tried it. My confidence was low, and without a support group there was this huge difficulty to stop what I was doing.

Having support is key, speak to your friends, family, partner, anyone you can if you're ever feeling low about yourself. There's no need to look at yourself and feel miserable, we all know going to the gym and eating healthy, drinking plenty of water is great for you, your body and your skin but don't deny yourself treats. You want that pizza? Eat it, why deny great food? Don't punish yourself either, just have a steady workout or even go for a walk if you feel a bit bloated, any exercise is great, and noticing results is even greater, especially if you're lacking the bit of old confidence. The best thing to do, is to not compare yourself to others, we're all different. Models, celebs, it's their job to look the way they do, that's why they spend mega monies on personal trainers!


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